Staying on the tenure track when you probably won’t get tenure

Sometimes I worry that I shouldn’t be in graduate school, that because my migraines may make the standard tenure track job impossible for me, I should be pursuing something else. But I’ve watched so many talented friends flounder for months or years on the job market working soul sucking jobs with employers who think you should pay for the privilege of working for them. I like graduate school and it’s paying me enough to get by and beat back my student loans a bit. Why would I quit now? I’ve written a bit more about this over on Tenure, She Wrote.

 

Bulbs from my mother

From 3QD:

What the Old Woman Said

I will tell you this. There was a garden by the pump. Fallow land given me.
My father built flowerbeds. Offshoots of paths. Geometric patterns.
Cuttings. Bulbs from my mother. The texture of earth.
Stone. The smell of water. I could grow anything.

I will tell you this. There was a pond. Wrinkles of mud. Pups that were drowned there.
Dragged to the bank. Sacksful slit open. Way beyond saving.
Names that I gave them. Returned to the water. Each small splash.
Spirals expanding. My own face rippling.

I will tell you this. There was a heron. Constant. Returning.
Stilt-leg. Growing above water. Curtain of willows.
Everything still. A crowning of feathers.
Inflections of music. Nothing was moving.

I will tell you this. There were meadows. Light. Nectar from clover.
More flowers than I could name. Armfuls I carried.
Stems that I split. Smelling of summer.
Chains on my neck. Ankles. The bones of my wrists. Knowing nothing.

I will tell you this. There was a boy. Eyes like the sky.
Eyes like my father’s. Children imagined. Rooms that were borrowed.
Rooms  that were painted. Stories invented.
Histories. Futures. We knew everything.

I will tell you this. There was a man. Veins under skin.
Bones. Barely there. His stuttered breathing.
Green light on a screen. Intermittent beeping.
False light. False music. Someone was dying.

I will tell you this. I had seen his face on the shroud.
Running and bleeding. Wounds on his hands.
Pictures on glass. Coloured and leaded.
Faces on statues. A cross through his heart. Light  always fading.

I will tell you this. There was a room. White. A white plate on the table.
A man at the table. Notes in his voice. A tune that I knew.
Beauty in the movements of his face. His arms. Frisson of wings.
Touch. Touch me. But he already had. I had forgotten everything.

I will tell you this. Some days are unbearable. Horizontal planes.
Moment to moment. Each long tick. I have been lonely.
Last night. A dream of a heron. The span of his wings.
Sounding through air. Listen. Listen. I am disappearing.

by Eileen Sheehan
from Song of the Midnight Fox
Doghouse Books, Tralee, 2004

While you’re waiting for the bus

Stuff worth reading

Is Organic Agriculture ‘Affluent Narcissism?’

How murderers tell stories: director Joshua Oppenheimer on ‘The Act of Killing’

What happens during the dying process?

Does Europe Exist? Skepticism is a nicer word than hatred: say what you mean and be careful of the spelling.

These two 15-year-olds chased down a kidnapper on their bikes Teenagers are people. Often awesome people.

Whistleblowing Is the New Civil Disobedience: Why Edward Snowden Matters A protest I would go to

Could Photosynthesis Be Our Best Defense Against Climate Change? Soil will save us!

While you’re waiting for the bus

Stuff worth reading

Why Don’t Americans Take More Vacations? Blame It on Independence Day History ruins all the holidays.

Is long-term solitary confinement torture? We jail and torture an enormous proportion of our population.

Marion Bartoli wins Wimbledon, defeating Sabine Lisicki <3

Dwelling on the positives The tenure track is hard, but if you love it, it might be worth it.

Home Economics: The Link Between Work-Life Balance and Income Equality I’m starting to use people’s opinion of /Lean In/ to gauge assholishness.

The Straight, White Dudes’ Guide to Discussing Diversity This is also good advice for people who want to make apps that are not a giant waste of time.